Updated: Mar 8, 2020
I don’t need international women’s day. Thanks to my parents, the environment in which I grew up, the times and decade in which I was born and the choices I made so far. I don’t need International women’s day, because I was lucky to be given the right to choose.
I don’t need international women’s day since I chose to share my life with a spouse who chose to spend his life with me as well. In our home we have equal rights, we don’t always have the same opinions, but we know we have the right to think differently. We don’t always want the same things, but we remember that choosing to compromise is also a choice, not an obligation, and we make sure each of us compromises equally because equality is what it takes to make it work. I chose to spend my life with him because I was given the right to choose.
Being self employed, I am responsible for my own income. I don’t get any less than anyone else who would do the same things that I do. I chose to be self employed not because I couldn’t get a job out there or because I couldn’t get a fair salary for what I am capable of doing. I measured the pros and cons that come with it and I made my own decision because I was given the right to make a choice and that was my choice.
I have a boy and a girl, they are different, I can’t tell if they are more different than 2 brothers or 2 sisters, but they are different at least in one specific chromosome without a doubt. We are not trying to hide the fact that they are different, and they know that they were born differently and that among other things only women can give birth and nurse their babies, and that statistically men are taller and physically stronger. They also know it doesn’t give them any different rights.
We had a conversation the other day about international women’s day, and what do we need it for. We were talking about the fact that not everyone agrees that women and men have the same rights, not every country and not even every society within a country gives a woman the right to choose whom to marry, what profession to have, what to wear and even the choice of driving and singing publicly. It’s not from a different planet, it’s close to us and we have the responsibility to help other women get their right to choose. We were talking about the fact that it’s totally fine for someone to choose different than us, and even to choose to live their life unequally with their own spouses, as long as they know that they have other options, that they choose it freely, not hurting anyone or breaking any law while always bearing in mind that they have the right to change their mind and make a different choice at any given time.
We explained to our kids the fact that women were arrested not too long ago for fighting for their right to vote and for their legitimate struggle for other equal rights. We were talking about the fact that African Americans were also discriminated against and that fighting for equal rights is not just a matter of gender. We let our kids know that we are trying to get better with the times and that speaking up for your values makes a difference.
I was given the right to choose and I keep it, for me, for other women, for both my boy and my girl, so my son would never think that being a male gives him any more rights than his sister or any other female has, and that my girl wouldn’t think that having two X chromosomes gives her any more or less rights than anyone else.
I don’t need International women’s day, but I choose to observe it, every day, with what I do and say, with what I stand for, with the choices I make. I don’t need International women’s day, but honestly, I actually do, because I have the right to choose, but not all women do. I choose to raise my voice for them too.